So I’ve been posting every day for awhile and I’m kind of on a roll, and I’m afraid to stop. Just like I’m afraid to stop boot camp in the early mornings. I’ve gotten myself into a really good routine and I think my whole productive world might come crashing down if I mess with anything. I DO NOT LIKE CHANGE. Did you get that last thought? If not, here it is again: I DO NOT LIKE CHANGE. at all.
I don’t like changing purses. I don’t like changing my furniture around. I don’t like when Fareway changes their freezer section. I don’t like dieting because it requires me to change my eating habits. And I don’t like when Panera changes the flavors of their bagels; when is passion fruit coming back anyway?
CHANGE SCARES ME. It makes me feel out of control of my cozy little existence. It makes me feel kind of panicky because I can’t predict how things are going to be. I’m the kind of person who likes to eat the exact same thing for breakfast every day because it’s the exact same thing and I like sameness—right now that’s a spinach, cottage cheese, banana, peanut butter, chocolate protein powder smoothie (Hey! Don’t knock it till you try it! It’s actually very excellent), and I look forward to this thing every day—seriously. I don’t know what I would do if my blender broke—probably cry.
This change phobia poses problems when I have to adjust to things like moving—which I told Brent I would never do again, kids growing up, and friends moving away. But it’s also the reason I value God’s unchanging nature. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow (Hebrews 13:8)—even when I’m not. Even though I can’t always predict what He will do, I know it will be consistent with His nature and with how He has worked in my life in the past. This allows me to [attempt to] fully trust Him because He is always “for” me. He will never turn against me. I can predict His protection and count on His grace even amidst the twisting and turning of my life. That is a huge comfort to me since I can’t see the future.
He’s got it, and that’s all I need to know.
Ok. I better get rolling, rolling, rolling. My smoothie awaits. MMMM.
They will perish, but you remain;
they will all wear out like a garment.
Like clothing you will change them
and they will be discarded.
But you remain the same,
and your years will never end.
The children of your servants will live in your presence;
their descendants will be established before you.