Saturday, April 23, 2011


Oh Jesus!

My Jesus!  You are He, that baby in my arms…

When I first held you--carefully, nervously--on that night of your birth, I pondered your perfect nose…your little fists…your tiny toes…your lusty cries--the life that came from my body.

How could I have fathomed the agony of watching you beaten, and bruised, and crucified like a thief--my firstborn, my heart?  Your cries pierced my soul, and as your blood drained, so did my hope. I can give you life no longer.

God has promised you that. God has promised me that. Do I believe Him? 

Where are you now, my Jesus? Descending into Hell?  Are you taking even my horrors, my brokenness, my failures upon you?  I am so sorry, my Son…my Savior.  I wish I could have taken your place; but I am not stain-less, nor spot-less, nor whole.  You are all of these. You were necessary. Now you are gone—from me, for me.

God has said you will rise again—to new Life. God says I will have new Life in You. Do I believe Him?

Your Father God forewarned me of yesterday.  He sent you to die…but it is I who helped to give you life, Jesus. Suffering seemed so far away on that first night. You were my son, too. I ache for you.  He said your shed blood would be the final sacrifice—once for all. 

God has promised that you will defeat death.  God has promised me eternal life.  Do I believe Him?

God has spoken of joy in the morning. but this night is very long—so long. I will not sleep, nor have I since you died, my Love.  My child, I wait for you.  I need you.  Be my Comforter.

He has said you will ascend to your heavenly home—so I can truly go Home. Do I believe Him?

I want to.

I wait. I hope. I pray. I cry.

Breathe again, my child; for me…for all.  God has spoken.

I believe Him.


I believe in God, the Father Almighty,
    the Maker of heaven and earth,
    and in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord:

Who was conceived by the Holy Ghost,
    born of the virgin Mary,
    suffered under Pontius Pilate,
    was crucified, dead, and buried;

He descended into hell.

The third day He arose again from the dead;

He ascended into heaven,
    and sitteth on the right hand of God the Father Almighty;
    from thence he shall come to judge the quick and the dead.

I believe in the Holy Ghost;
    the holy catholic church;
    the communion of saints;
    the forgiveness of sins;
    the resurrection of the body;
    and the life everlasting.


The Apostles’ Creed

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