Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Graduation To Not Do

My “TO NOT DO” list worked so well for Christmas that I have decided to implement one for Tess’s upcoming graduation party.  Because of the personality God gave me (check it out here), I struggle to match my expectations with reality.  But, since coming up with my “TO NOT DO” system this winter, I have been freed from a bunch of the restrictions I used to place upon myself.  Now I am a much nicer person during these preparation times.  Here is my plan for the week:


  • I will not worry about the graduation menu which Tess has chosen.  I’m not exactly sure everyone will know how to build a “Mexican Fiesta” out of chips, chicken, beans, and guacamole,  but I am planning to have her draw a detailed diagram of the finished product—with directions--and place it next to the multiple dishes of ingredients.  My job is not to understand, my job is to pay for groceries.
  • I will not pull every weed that exists anywhere around my house even if they make me nervous—because as we know from my previous post, nobody cares.
  • I will not remove the decor from the top of my cupboards and dust that spot, even though I have not dusted up there since Luke’s graduation two years ago, because no one, not even my dad, is that tall.
  • I will not worry about the huge dark spot on the cement by my door where my formerly 136 pound dog lays every day. I will just cover it with a colorful rug.  This will just add to the “Mexican Fiesta”  flavor. 
  • I will not make my children clean their rooms or bathrooms for the event.  I will just buy a roll of caution tape and put it across the hallway so that those who enter are warned (just kidding).
  • I will not worry about painting the lights on the detached garage—even though they are white and the ones on the house are brown—because I haven’t painted them yet and they have been there at least 10 years and no one has mentioned them—because as we remember, nobody cares.
  • I will not keep reminding my daughter that she needs to burn her graduation slide show to a DVD so we can show it on the TV.  It’s her thing…and anyway, it makes me sad to watch it.
  • I will not clean my very greasy grill which is on the porch where many will sit and eat their “Mexican Fiesta”, I will just remove it the garage and pretend it doesn’t exist.
  • I will not soak and cook dry black beans even though they’re cheaper, I will just buy a million cans at ALDIs.
  • I will not make my own salsa—even though it’s better than the jarred stuff—because it will stress me out to make enough for the masses.
  • I will not spend time excavating every one of Tess’s cute and adorable childhood artifacts to put on display because, pretty much, they are only cute and adorable to me.
  • I will not worry if my blog posts are few and far between during this busy time.
  • I will not ignore my family, saying I have to get ready for the party, if they beg me to eat pizza with them and watch “War Horse” in the basement—which will also be messy unless someone volunteers to tidy it up. 
  • I will not be mean to my husband when he offers to help.  Sometimes I’m not nice because I am obsessive.  Can you believe it?

Whew.  I feel free.  But now I need to clean my house.  But only because I want to.  But I’m not cleaning the garage. 

My kids will be so pleased.

And I will be so relaxed, I might even break into the graduation candy as a little reward for my lack of effort.  Don’t tell Tess.


  1. hahahaahahha. this list is great. CHEERS to you not to do list!!

  2. I love you, Tori! Brian wants me to borrow this idea in the hopes that it will make me a nicer person. Probably most needed in the "getting ready to go someplace" area. :)