Desperate Love

Wow. I am back from Mexico--tanned and relaxed and having great difficulty adjusting to real life again. There's something to be said for sitting in a beach chair for four sunny days straight and reading, until completion, three novels while listening to the sea gulls calling and the waves gently lapping on the sand. But, now I am in Iowa. And it is cold. And it is white. And it is snowing--what a surprise. That (meaning all of that Iowa stuff) is why I am struggling.

I did learn something, though, while I was at the resort with my husband of almost 21 years. When Brent and I vacation together, just the two of us, we spend nearly all of our waking hours together. We talk and we walk and we soak up the sun side by side, and the most wonderful thing happens; I fall in love with him all over again. I am able to focus on Brent during our time away without distractions or interruptions. He is able to leave the stress of work at home and be attentive to me. We spend long, leisurely hours together and truly enjoy each other.

And then it happens. We come home. We each go our separate ways, fulfilling our individual responsibilities, and I feel like crying because I miss him desperately. Yes, that is the right word--desperate. I remember when we were dating and I felt like I might not be able to breathe, or even live, if I couldn't be with him. I felt desperate then, because I loved him so much. When we return from these trips, I feel that same desperate love for him that I felt all those years ago. Sometimes I forget how desperately I love Brent. Sometimes, I let the worries of the world and the grocery shopping distract me from my first and powerful love--desperate love. Sometimes, I forget who he is to me.

Aren't we like that with God? God desperately loves us and often calls us His bride in the Bible. And there are times that we, as believers, have an overpowering love for our Father, our Groom. We love Him desperately and want to spend time with Him and serve Him. We want to show how much we love Him by our acts of sacrifice and obedience. When do these times happen and how do we make them happen more?

I think, just as I learned on my trip to Mexico, spending time walking and talking and sitting with God, soaking up his Son, as often as possible, is the key. Relationship is all about time and attention and lack of distraction. Relationship is all about long, leisurely hours enjoying the one that your heart so desperately loves--so that you remember that you love Him--so that you remember who He is to you.

When is the last time you spent some leisurely hours (or minutes, if you are a Mom with little children) with God--just Him alone--reading His word, singing His songs, just enjoying His presence? When is the last time you longed for Him and thought you might not live if you couldn't be with Him? God loves you DESPERATELY--believe it---and fall in love with Him all over again.

"As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God."

Psalm 42:1